ASK A PARENT COACH

I found the best website today! It is run by Partnership for Drug-Free Kids and I am so impressed! You can contact this organization if you have concerns about your child and they can help steer the right direction for the help you may need. They also have a volunteer staff (Carla returned my call and explained what they do) who has been through the trials of raising a child in today's drug influenced world--you can call them, fill out a form or do an online chat--whatever works best for you. Check out this great resource--I am also adding a resource link from the SoberCoachingYourTeen.com.

Partnership for Drug-Free Kids | Portal: "Who are Parent Coaches? Parent Coaches are moms and dads just like you who have been personally affected by a child's substance use. They are not therapists – they are parents who have been there and received special training and support from the Partnership and our clinical partner, the Center for Motivation and Change, to help other families through similar struggles. Their answers can help you too. To connect with a counselor experienced in the field of substance use, please call our Helpline at 1-855-DRUGFREE."

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Parental action is key to fighting teen substance abuse in area |

Yes this is true--parents need to do something, anything to address this issue--just as they address a myriad of issues everyday--they have to address school, futures, manners, puberty, peers, health, drivingect.--but this article begins like so many " But with teen alcohol and drug use on the rise in recent years" NO IT ISN't on the rise! Every few years kids take to opiate, then in a year or so it's meth, then hull eugenics, then back to booze or heroin--and everytime this happens reporters act shocked, "(name your drug) is on the rise!" Help, the world's on fire--kids are taking drugs!

Sorry for the sarcasm. I get so tired of folks screaming fire in a crowded room to garner attention. Use Fear--use guilt, use shame--why don't we stick with facts and education? People use drugs. Kids experiment. That is never going to change.

Parents must address it--but not with scare tactics--let's use common sense. If you are a mom or dad--go to the website, take the awareness test and address drinking and drugging as you do all other growing up issues. You are a good parent--don't get sucked in with the hysterics.

Addiction in the suburbs series: Parental action is key to fighting teen substance abuse in area | mySuburbanLife.com: "Most parents don’t want to think about their child drinking alcohol or using drugs. But with teen alcohol and drug use on the rise in recent years, there are steps parents can take to address these issues before they lead to serious consequences."



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Lost my step-nephew to drug addiction--

He was only 21. I wasn't close to him. Wasn't even close enough to know he was into meth. Yet I feel a connection. And I am so sad about yet another loss to our family.

This young man is not the first one to be lost in our family to this disease of addiction. I had two step brothers lost to heroin. I had a cousin (who I was close to) fall off a porch drunk and lose her life. I've had numerous friends and an ex husband die from addiction. Alcoholism and addiction is aggressive. It doesn't let go easily.

For all of you who have lost loved ones to this disease, know you are in my heart, just as my young step nephew is. Sometimes I hate this disease--but have to remember that there is another choice. Please support recovery in any manner you can.

This is one of mine   YoungSoberFree.com

Montana favors parents’ rights over kids’ safety, advocates charge

This is a really tough one--sometimes states act more for the rights of parents and often states do the opposite "protecting" the child so much that they actually hurt them. Here these 2 women claim that Montana protects the rights of parents over the child. In Idaho, right beside Montana--I saw the oppositive experience where my friend's daughter lost her innocence because of social services.

Angry at her mother, the girl told social services that her stepdad had abused her. Mom didn't believe it. But social services took custody and placed her in foster care. They took my friend's daughter to a doctor for testing and low and behold, the girl was a virgin. Social services still did not believe Mom so kept the girl for over 6 months. When she was finally returned to the family, she came back no longer a virgin. So how well was this girl protected? She was 13 or 14 at the time.

My friend was furious but there was really nothing she could do. Its a fine line they walk in social services and I just wish they could use common sense! In unsure cases, I support the parents.

Here's the Montana story:

Montana favors parents’ rights over kids’ safety, advocates charge | News | bozemandailychronicle.com: "“Overall, the child abuse and neglect system is failing kids miserably,” said Nancy Mitchell, 76. “There needs to be some major changes to protect kids, and they are not being protected right now.”"

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Highway Patrol, ODOT: Talk to your kids about drugged driving for Holidays

We hear about Drunk driving all the time and often forget about drugged driving. Same thing actually.

When you talk to your teens this season about drunk driving, don't leave out the "drugged driving" part, either. Your kids are smart--smart enough to say, "I didn't have any drinks" justifying their crash when in fact they had taken 3 downers and smoked  a joint! Just cover your basis in parent/teen drunk/drugged driving talk this year.

Story here: Highway Patrol, ODOT: Talk to your kids about drugged driving: "The signs will show messages outlining the increase in drug related crashes and urging them to talk about the drug abuse epidemic. This is part of the state’s Start Talking Initiative, the release said."

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Drinking homemade brew in school sends four students to hospital

I was thinking that "homemade brew" was fermenting potatoes! This is made from OTCs! Never too old to learn about the ingenuity of kids and mind-affecting chemicals. Better read this article to stay informed.

Drinking homemade brew in school sends four students to hospital - The Buffalo News: "The school sent home a letter to parents on Wednesday warning them that the homemade mixture is referred to as "Lean" and that the instructions on how to make it can be found on numerous Internet sites. "Please make your children aware that the misuse of any drug, prescription or over-the-counter, is potentially dangerous and/or deadly, and that they should never drink from an opened bottle that is not their own," the letter read. "Please also make sure that medications in your home are secured from possible misuse.""

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More parents are taking drugs while children watch, and the viral videos are 'shaming' addicts

OMG-- a horrible image of parents-grandparents in addiction and what it does to our children. The only message here is "WHY?" Such an aggressive disease in many families. Each small thing that each of us does helps break the cycle. Keep up the good work is my message for each and every one of you reading this blog!

More parents are taking drugs while children watch, and the viral videos are 'shaming' addicts | The Independent: "While the adults were charged with child endangerment and are awaiting trial, the photo of their possible overdose has gone viral, prompting strong criticism and shaming of their ability to look after a child."



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Teens and substance abuse: Insights from the treatment field

This sounds like a good program--one thing I want to know is if they teach teh parents to become their kid's coach? That would be the ultimate center for teens---

Teens and substance abuse: Insights from the treatment field | The Daniel Island News: "The ASSET program, run by Viktoriya Magid, PhD, targets kids ages 12 to 18 and offers two ongoing care tracks - one for prevention and another for treatment - as well as assessments, drug screenings, medication management, teen coaching, and parent coaching. "



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LIVE FACEBOOK CHAT on Rx Stimulant Abuse Among Students

https://drugfree.scdn2.secure.raxcdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/09/Meet-the-Parents-Hour-Alan-Schwarz-ADHD-Nation-Partnership-for-Drug-Free-Kids-September-20-2016-cropped-200x300.jpg
LIVE FACEBOOK CHAT on Rx Stimulant Abuse Among Students - Partnership for Drug-Free Kids:



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Understanding the Plight of Zokos Children

I sometimes lament what happens here with our drug addicted parents--and then I read something like this--the Plight of Zokos Children...thank you God for our blessings...

FrontPageAfrica Newspaper - Understanding the Plight of Zokos Children: "Many are ex-combatants or former child soldiers who are living with the recurring ill effects of the civil war and the policy neglect that came thereafter."



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Officials gather to seek cure for area's drug crisis | Local News | tribdem.com

Great article--says you can't "jail" your way out of opioid addiction, you can't "treat" your way out of the epidemic, but you can use "life skills" to get yourself out of the problem--hmmm, maybe..does joining a 12 Step program qualify for changing your life skills.

Opiod epidemic: Officials gather to seek cure for area's drug crisis | Local News | tribdem.com: "“We can’t jail ourselves out of this problem,” said Langerholc, who is also the lead prosecutor for the Cambria County Drug Task Force. “We can’t treat our way out of this problem.” A July 12 report from the Drug Enforcement Administration’s Philadelphia division showed a 23 percent increase in overdose deaths in 2015. Cambria County saw a 32 percent increase.  Yaw said 85 percent of heroin users start by abusing pain medication. The epidemic affects people of all age groups, social classes and races, he added, so a multifaceted approach is required to address the issue."



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Substance abuse is factor in up to 80% of cases where a child is removed from a home.

California is working hard to help kids stay out of foster care--how? By helping their drug addicted parents. I love it. This is a good use of taxpayer dollars rather than jailing parents and fostering out kids. This is a program that if run right can make a huge difference in the lives of drug addicts and their children. In the long run, it will also save the taxpayer money. Read the article below.

California Court Helps Kids By Healing Parents' Addictions : Shots - Health News : NPR: " "Graduation from this court is considered a critical factor in determination that the children of participants will be safe from any further exposure to the danger and destructive impact of parental substance abuse." There has been a surge recently, across the U.S., in the number of children entering the foster care system after years of decline. Nationally, roughly 265,000 kids entered foster care in 2015 — the highest number since 2008, according to a recent government report."



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Sober Coaching Your Teen

Yahoo! We launched the updated website for parents of teens in trouble with drugs. It's user-friendly,  has free downloads, gives parents basic info and of course talks about our parental workbook. Please pass on info to any parents you know who might benefit! Thanks (oh and tell me if you like the site--I am pretty proud of my newly-learned website revamping skills!)

Sober Coaching Your Teen: "How will our workbook help you deal with your teen? Of course we want our children to stop drinking and abusing drugs. The Sober Coaching You Teen workbook will jump-start the process with research-based interventions using the Teaching-Family Model principles of developing empathy, boundaries, taking responsibility, and recognizing thinking errors. "

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Are parents the cause of addiction?

Parents are not the cause of addiction. No matter how much influence parents believe they have over a child, the reality is, parents will only influence approximately 25% of what a child will do. Nevertheless, as I work in the field of adolescent substance abuse, I find many parents believing they are the source of their child’s addiction. Maybe this is because; society expects parents to have control over their child. For example, when a child is running wild in the grocery store, don’t we all whisper to ourselves “They need to get control of their child?” So when a teenager is drinking or doing drugs, of course the blame will fall back on the parents.

However, when it comes to addiction, I can tell you from a professional background and a personal background that parents do not create or reinforce addiction. I was brought up in a warm loving family, where my parents helped when needed but also let life teach when needed.
But at the age of fourteen I drank and smoked weed for the first time and the rest is history. I continued to use substances up until the age of 22. I eventually experienced so many natural negative consequences, I decided to change.

During my recovery, I discovered the source of my addiction was a multitude of factors, such has low self-esteem, social anxiety, and a personality trait that craves adventure. Nowhere, did I find my parents as a part of my addiction. Unless a parent is forcing a child to drink or do drugs, it is simply irrational to believe a parent has enough control to be responsible for a child’s addiction. If a parent was responsible for their child’s addiction then a parent would also be able to stop their child’s addiction.

-Chad Hepler works as an addiction counselor at an adolescent treatment center. He has published two books about his recovery, titled, Intervention: Anything But My Own Skin, and Beyond Intervention: A Memoir of Addiction and Recovery by Hepler, Chad (2012) Paperback.

Effective anti-drug drives focus on roots, not killing addicts |

There are some new studies out (read below video) that say if you teach parenting skills even to addicted mothers and if nurses visit these addicted mothers, their children have a less likely chance of abusing drugs themselves. It would be nice believe that we can teach addicted mothers how to take care of their kids--I haven't really seen that in my work, but maybe I am missing something. Most of the time addicted mothers just seem to get worse--I'd like to meet these counselors who are making this happen. Often, it is not so much the counseling or parenting skills that make the difference but the connection between the the helper and the helpee that really makes a difference. As a society, we keep trying to improve and I have to love us for that even if we get it wrong so many times before we get it right. If frequent contact with addicted mothers does in fact help their kids, good for us who keep trying. but i suspect that actually it is the skills of the ones working with the addicted moms rather than really teaching them much.

Effective anti-drug drives focus on roots, not killing addicts | Inquirer Global Nation: "Studies reported in the Journal of Child Abuse and Neglect (2012) and Pediatrics (2008) reveal that intervention at the family level can have significant impact if it starts as early as during pregnancy and early infancy for those with an addicted mother. Being born to addicted parents puts a child in one of the highest-risk groups for drug use, but longitudinal studies show that visits by trained nurses or social workers tasked with helping the mother deal with practical life issues (health, housing, etc.) and with parenting challenges markedly reduced drug use when the child reached adolescence. Programs that focus on teaching parenting skills not just to addicted parents, but also to the general population also proved to be effective in curbing drug use and related behavior, according to studies published in the Health Education Research (2008) and Drug and Alcohol Dependence (2007)."



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"Pharming parties" remind me of the Sties Pill parties

What goes around comes around. In the sixties we had parties tao beat all parties--we took handfuls of pills, smoked weed, drank, and dropped acid all at the same time. No wonder so many of us jumped out windows and such! No laughing matter, we always had huge bowls filled will all kinds of colored pills. Many ate them like M and Ms. I used to try to pick out the yellows and reds--not sure why. I chased them down with my beer or slow gin. I am not sure why I am still here. Maybe to pass on messages.

Anyway, yes, the kids need to be taught about prescriptions--but they are still going to experiment. Can we stop it? Not really--but we can model good behavior, make sure they know we don't approve and that it is dangerous and hope they make it to adulthood like I did!

"Pharming parties" put teenagers at risk for prescription drug abuse: "According to the National Institute on Drug Abuse, prescription and over-the-counter drugs are the most commonly abused substances by Americans age 14 and older, after marijuana and alcohol. Eden said, "Parents need to be aware. They need to not assume oh my child would never do that, because anybody's child could.""

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Does naloxone encourage drug use - Practical Recovery

People send me things-some relevant, some silly, some asking to promote their treatment centers--some grateful people who use Day By Day Books and love them--this morning I received an email about naloxone to help combat overdose. Many believe that making this widely available will contribute to careless drug use because addicts will feel they have a way out--I'm not sure.

Do addicts really plan that far ahead? I know I didn't. I never sat and said to myself, "I think I can use more of this drug because my friends are here who will surely get me to the hospital." I never thought of the consequences, THAT was part of my addiction. Is naloxone a good thing? I am inclined to say yes. Below is a link to an entire guideline about the use of this safety drug.

Naloxone: Everything You Need to Know - Practical Recovery: "Does naloxone encourage drug use? The argument that access to naloxone increases or encourages drug use has yet to be proven. The thought is that naloxone instills a false sense of safety and encourages users to push past “safe” levels of use. Furthermore, some argue that providing an antidote sends the message that drug use is socially acceptable. As one scientific article points out, these arguments have no research to back them up, and to limit access to a life-saving drug based on unfounded theories is just plain unethical. Do you or someone you know need help with an opiate addiction? Detox, followed by inpatient or outpatient treatment can provide a great foundation for recovery."



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